Thursday, December 14, 2006

What Now?

this e-coli business has got to come to an end.

Now folks are saying it is the LETTUCE, not the green onions, not the white onions, not the pork. if Taco Bell doesn't find the source of the problem asap or at least lie that they have, they are going to end up pulling everything on the menu, one by one, to ease customers' fears until they have nothing but mountain dew to serve.

so for the love of all things delicious, will people (taco bell, lawyers, FDA, whohaveyou) get this situation under control already?

here are my fears about the impact of this scare (and a fear other things):
1. my blog will crash and burn, top gun style (someone said that to me recently about the ending of a relationship and i quite like it).
2. assuming jay leno has told a lot of bad jokes about taco bell in recent weeks, those will continue. i do not want jay leno getting laughs at the expense of taco bell. i do not like him. he is not funny.
3. democrats are going to lose the senate because of this south dakota senator's serious illness. we just can't win even when we have.
4. the financial impact of the e-coli scare will force taco bells to shorten their hours, thereby forcing the poor urban taco bells to close at approx 7 pm.
5. sauce packets--we won't even see them in the city; the burbs will stop allowing customers to take as many as they wish.
6. Pope Bendict XVI
7. along with shortening hours, taco bell will shorten its menu. no crunchwraps? no enchiritos? no cheesy gordita crunch?
8. more taco bells connected to KFCs.
9. mean boys
10. i'll never find a fulfilling job or someone to pay me to stay at home.

wow. that was draining. i'll leave the next 10 for another day.


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