Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Can this post be true? Seriously?

Steve Johnson wrote this announcement on a google group 3 years ago. It's a preposterous story. Unbelieveable, though? I like to think not. I've highlighted the parts that make me think it's a joke and yet, these are the same parts that make me want to believe this is entirely fact.

After 35 years of almost continuous employment at Taco Bell, I've decided to fill my last Taco shell, and wear for the last time with pride the Taco Bell apron and hat.
It started for me back in 1968, early in college, working at a company-owned Taco Bell in Southern California. I was the cashier, while also preparing the food from the tray and steam table behind me. My starting pay was $1.60 per hour back then, with no benefits. But through the years, I kept the same position the entire time, and earned increases in pay that got me up to $8.00 per hour today (also with no benefits).
My only break in Taco Bell employment was when I joined the U.S. Military. I quickly rose through the ranks and made General, but the challenge was just not there. After becoming General, I left the military and returned back to my roots, serving customers at the same Taco Bell. Taco Bell was so generous when I came back, not only did I get the same position (cashier) my pay was even increased! Some told me the increase was just because the minimum wage went up, but it had to be because Taco Bell values their employees with regular wage increases.
As the years went by, I got married and had six children. With my Taco Bell salary I raised six fine kids. All six have graduated college, going to major colleges in the Southern California area which were Cal Tech, UCLA, UC Santa Barbara, Pepperdine, San Diego State University, and Cal State Northridge. My kids are now putting their educations to use, all working as cashiers at different Taco Bells. I am extremely proud of the career paths all my kids are now taking. And to think, if it wasn't for all the support Taco Bell has given me over the years, including raising my pay from $1.60 to $8.00 per hour, I wouldn't have been able to accomplish this, and everything else my fine Taco Bell salary has given me. I have been truly blessed.
I now plan to take it easy, enjoying being semi-retired, while collecting my Government guaranteed minimum Social Security benefits. Having no pension doesn't bother me the least, for all the good memories I have from Taco Bell over the years will make up for that. And if money gets tight in the future for me and my wife, I can always get some part-time job helping out at a neighborhood Taco Bell during their rush hours, while collecting bottles and cans out of neighborhood garbage cans.
To conclude, thank you Taco Bell for a wonderful 35 years. It has been great!


yeah, reading it for a second time put serious doubts in my mind, and yet...and yet i can understand such a devotion to taco bell.

5 Comments:

Anonymous ganga said...

definitely not true

4:04:00 AM  
Blogger whipcreamy said...

i agree with Ganga...so not true...did you see all the colleges the kids went to? such an array! the part that really got me was the "i don't care that there is no pension because i have the taco bell memories" where sis you find this, liz?

9:06:00 AM  
Blogger anne altman said...

taco bell memories: flies in the cheese?




...sorry. but flies and cheese and fast food are peas in a pod.

10:17:00 AM  
Blogger Liz said...

exactly--who's picky?
i can't reveal all my sources, whipcreamy.

10:32:00 AM  
Anonymous The Angry New Yorker said...

THIS STORY IS ABSOLUTELY NOT TRUE.

"My only break in Taco Bell employment was when I joined the U.S. Military. I quickly rose through the ranks and made General, but the challenge was just not there. After becoming General, I left the military and returned back to my roots..."

#1. You don't just "make" General.
#2. Generals spend their entire career working up to that rank.
#3. You can't become an officer without some sort of bachelor's degree from college.
#4. Assuming he did put in enough time and somehow managed to get a waiver for not completing college, he worked at Taco Bell for a combined total of 35 years... Unless this guy is like 200 years old, there's no way he could do both...

8:59:00 AM  

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